Unfinished first draft.
Before his baby brother and the marriage, Z thought his step father was really cool. His step father played the father role for him, and it seemed to be a real good situation. That quickly seemed to go away as soon as he had his wife and his baby on the way. Z was no longer important in his eyes. Z was forced to sleep on a seperate floor than the rest of the family, and his step father became controlling over the craziest things.
When Z was seven, he had the sudden urge to sleep on the floor instead of his bed. Feeling the need for permission, he asked his step father. For the simple satisfaction of having control, he told Z not to. Despite this instruction, when it came to be time for bed, Z laid down on the floor and went to sleep.
At one AM the door opened to reveal Z's step father. Being picked up by his wrist, Z awoke suddenly from the force, and had to go through a beating.
When Z was seven, he had the sudden urge to sleep on the floor instead of his bed. Feeling the need for permission, he asked his step father. For the simple satisfaction of having control, he told Z not to. Despite this instruction, when it came to be time for bed, Z laid down on the floor and went to sleep.
At one AM the door opened to reveal Z's step father. Being picked up by his wrist, Z awoke suddenly from the force, and had to go through a beating.


4 Comments:
Uber personal. Cool.
wow!!... good great start.. im interested to know more!!MORE!..
is definately a narrative
good start....def make sure that we get a good example of what's going on. I am anxious to see what comes next!
Hmmm this leaves me wanting to know more. Like the previous comment try elaborating on examples and the effects.
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